Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
