He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
