I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Randomize
