Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
