Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize
