Nicole vs. Life
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
And then he peed in my hair
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