Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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