and you said cock pushups were impossible
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Randomize
