WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
