Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Randomize
