i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
a search helicopter?!
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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