the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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