absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Randomize
