I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
That's when you crack a 10am beer
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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