yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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