what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize
