I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize