i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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