You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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