glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
