is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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