Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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