new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
