READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
