I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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