Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
My dick has a subreddit
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Randomize
