Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
