Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
