i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
