p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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