I'm really into asian looking animals
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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