Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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