it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize
