I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
