i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
