Well douche your snatch and let's go!
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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