My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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