And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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