It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Randomize