I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
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