i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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