Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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