That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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