You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I pour the whiskey from now on
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
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