He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
