And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
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