But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Umm I'm too high to move.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
