so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Randomize
