Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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