So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
